New Mariah Carey Video! 'Touch My Body'

Mariah Carey does it big or she doesn't do it at all. But in her new "Touch My Body" video, she's doing it big and totally funny, with 30 Rock's Jack McBrayer (the new Jack McFarland!), a pink princess party dress (which we really want), a for-real unicorn (which we really want), a Catholic school girl costume circa Camelot-era Britney, and over four full minutes of free advertising for YouTube.

Director Brett Ratner -- who, in addition to directing several feature films, shot five other Mariah videos and Jessica Simpson in her "These Boots Were Made For Walkin'" video -- praised Mariah, saying "Mariah is musically at the top of her game and has never looked better..." and we'd be hard-pressed to disagree -- you could freaking clean your dirty laundry on that girl's abs.

Watch Mariah's "Touch My Body" sex jam video, off her 11^th album, E=MC ² -- out April 15 -- and don't miss her Spankin' New Ladies Week appearance this afternoon on TRL. Later, lambies!