Paula Abdul's "Rush, Rush" video (off her 1991 Spellbound album, which, despite selling 13 million copies, marked the beginning of the end of her early music career) is one of those classic vintage videos with so much terrible stuff going on that we don't even know where to start or if we should even start at all. Yet we must...First of all, throughout the duration of the video, it appears that Paula is dressed for a pep rally, a cabaret, a séance, and a bullfight, but none of those things ever actually come to fruition. Also, this video was made in 1991, which put Paula at approximately 30 -- are we really supposed to believe that she’s in high school? Or even college?
In keeping with the very (very) loose Rebel Without a Cause theme, it’s simultaneously the ‘50s and the ‘90s, but it looks like the ‘80s too. WTF?
And the gauzy scarves -- a mainstay in so many '90 videos -- what the hell are they a metaphor for? A thin vocal range?
And does Paula even ever stop to think about the fact that that the guy she's crushing on is freaking Ted "Theodore" Logan? Is that why her greasy boyfriend/pimp is trying to take him down in a half-hearted knife fight? And is Keanu Reeves a prince or a count or something that he appears to live in that fancy Spanish house all by himself?
We don’t know. We’re confused. Someone shine some light on this wreck.