Got a jones for the sickest, most bass-intensive headphones $349.95 can buy? Then the doctor is in… your ear, and by “doctor,” we mean Dre, who, along with Monster and Jimmy Iovine, just released his highly anticipated new “Beats By Dr. Dre” headphones. These definitely aren’t designed to bring more feeling to whichever book Oprah’s pimpin’ this week. Instead, they’re made for serious studio junkies, audio aficionados, and well, bass heads — as one of our video editors put it, Beats is like bass on ‘roids. Now, at nearly four bills, they don’t come cheap, but neither does baller status, right? Plus, they smell like new car and early ’90s West Coast rap. Now go get a pair at Best Buy or at your nearest Apple store, and go find yourself the next Eminem.

+ Relevant video: “Nuthin’ But a ‘G’ Thang’”