Happy 30th Birthday, Lil Wayne!

Happy Birthday, Weezy! You’re probably doing something really amazing right now.

Guess what, guys? Today is Lil Wayne‘s 30th birthday! And guess what else? You probably can’t afford to get him anything that he doesn’t already have because Weezy has a long history of getting a crap-ton of amazing presents on his birthday. Examples? Here you go: On his 27th birthday, Lil Wayne’s boss Birdman gifted him with a jewel-encrusted $1 million watch (WTF), and he made a cool $15 million last year, which is about as great a birthday gift as we could ever imagine.

So, now that we’re positive we can’t give Weezy anything he doesn’t already own, let’s create a sample birthday day itinerary that we sincerely hope Weezy takes into consideration. First, Wayne wakes up (in a bed with 30000 thread count sheets), and enjoys a delicious breakfast of French toast, eggs Benedict, and fruit salad sprinkled with 24k gold flakes. Because calories don’t count on your birthday! Next, he gets a call from BFF and Young Money cohort Nicki Minaj wishing him a good one, followed by a quick iPhone 5 face-time sesh with his bro Drake. Next, Weezy picks up the rest of his YMCMB crew and they all hop aboard Wayne’s personal plane (with a monogrammed interior, natch) and end up on a mega-yacht in Ibiza where they rage the night away. With models only. For two weeks straight. And did we mention calories still haven’t started counting? Best birthday in the world!!

Credit: Getty/Mr. Gif