Does this look like the face of someone who would pee in a bucket? Um…
You know that old saying, “when you gotta go, pee in a restaurant mop bucket”? No? Well neither had I until this morning when this story surfaced about Justin Bieber urinating into a restaurant mop bucket. Heinous and awful, right? Why would anyone do that? I asked myself the same thing. Did it actually happen? I don’t know. I wasn’t there, and I’m not God. All I know is that this is sweet, angelic Justin Bieber who befriends sick children and loves monkeys and auctions off his underwear to charity. There’s gotta be some deeper meaning here. Like Jeezy said, there’s levels to this s***. So let’s look at some reasons why Justin Bieber may have urinated into a restaurant mop bucket.
2.) Maybe the line to the bathroom was just way too long and full of girls dancing to “We Can’t Stop.” Justin Bieber saw a problem and sought out a solution. In the business world, that’s actually considered a valuable skill. Why not COMMEND Justin Bieber for his problem-solving skills and ability to follow through and complete a task?
3.) Maybe he honest to goodness thought the bucket was a toilet. You guys, they’re SO similarly shaped. Don’t act like you’ve never been there! Don’t act like you’ve never relieved yourself in a slop bucket in the back of a Chili’s. Hashtag COLLEGE!
Read up on more reasons why Justin Bieber would pee in a bucket after the jump.
4.) Maybe he felt bad about his pants.
5.) Maybe he was drunk… ON LIFE, Y’ALL!
6.) VIRAL MARKETING STUNT, Y’ALL! Is there an R. Kelly collabo in the works?
7.) Why he felt the need to bring Bill Clinton into this, I have no idea. He’s obviously never heard that man play sax. Surely Justin Bieber recalls that NAFTA actually helped Canada. IDK, maybe he’s protesting Bill Clinton’s repeal of the Glass-Stegall Act, which, you know, basically created a tumbling Jenga tower effect on the American economy. Actually, that’s gotta be it, right?
I leave you with this:
Everyday you gotta push yourself and those around you to be Great!!!
— Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) July 10, 2013
Photo credit: Getty Images