Lady Gaga Seduces Aphrodite Lady Aliens In ‘Venus,’ Emcees An Interplanetary Vogue Ball

Listen to Lady Gaga's "Venus."

Before takeoff, please adjust your face scorpion, and place your seat in the full upright position.

To color us surprised last Friday when we first listened to Lady Gaga‘s “Venus” snippet would be an understatement. Its sparse pulsing synth and lyrics about rocket ships and lady aliens made the David Bowie-influenced track one of the more bizarre seduction jamz we’d heard in a minute.

But, now that we’ve gotten our hands on the full track, it all makes sense. Crazy, otherwordly, barely intelligible sense, but still — sense!

Listen to Lady Gaga’s “Venus” after the jump.

As Mother Monster spies her “Goddess of Love,” she pulls out all the Space Age metaphorical stops to get into bed with the second rock from the sun: “Take me to your planet, take me to your planet/ Take me to your leader, your leader, your leader,” later adding, “Take me to your Venus, your Venus, your Venus.” What could possibly make these ridiculously unique lyrics more intriguing? Ummm, how about the fact that Gaga tweeted them to Lovatics worldwide in reference to Demi Lovato back in August?? L’INTRIGUE!

Nevertheless, that’s not the most important contribution to humanity that the planned second ARTPOP single (later replaced by “Do What U Want“) hath wrought. During Gaga’s futuristic ballroom emcee moment, where she channels something straight out of “Paris Is Burning: 2389,” she utters the line “Uranus!/ Don’t you know my ass is famous?!” That’s, like, the greatest version of “DON’T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!” that we’ve ever heard. (#SorryBoutIt, Reese Witherspoon.) Serve for the stars!

+ Listen to Lady Gaga’s “Venus.”

Photo credit: Interscope