Wanna be more “Confident”? Just heed these suggestions!
It’s a sad AND happy day for Justin Bieber Stans. Why sad? Well, because Justin’s #MusicMonday series has finally come to a close. But! It’s also happy because your boi is ending his latest musical journey on a high note. Cue: “Confident,” Justin’s bold, bouncy, slick new track featuring a blazing verse from Chance The Rapper.
In “Confident,” Justin primarily coos about how the girl he wants is, well, confident, not to mention “a fantasy” laid out right in front of him. SWOON. And here’s the thing: We’re not psychiatrists or whatever, but we have a sneaking suspicion that the only reason Justin now feels ready to get back on the dating market — after taking forever to get over his “Heartbreaker” — is because he’s regained his “PYD“-style swag! Right?? Like, there’s no way bro could have enough energy to get down on a plane, stove, train, roof, coffee table, etc. if he was still feeling weepy over his ex!
And guess what? You, too, can have Justin’s “PYD” swag! Simply heed one (or all) of the suggestions below to up your confidence game, and you’ll be bagging a hot chick or dude on the stove in no time.
1.) Arm your boudoir with some expensive bed linens: We’re talking, like, Pratesi milli-count sheets, pillows, euro shams, a duvet cover — the WORKS! Women love that ish.
Listen to Justin Bieber’s “Confident” featuring Chance The Rapper after the jump.
2.) Spritz on a signature scent: Contrary to popular belief, signature scents are not just for the ladies! In fact, it’s kinda nice to nuzzle your boyf and always have him smell like a subtle brand of musk and/or enormous bearded lumberjack. (TMI?)
3.) Buy an unlimited membership to CrossFit: We’re not advocating that all bros should try to achieve Justin Bieber-levels of ripped. We’re juuuuust saying that laydezzzz like a man with well-defined pecs.
4.) Get one of those professional hot shaves: We imagine that a hot shave to a man is kind of like a blowout to a lady: They’re totally unnecessary, but they just feel sooooooo damn good. Don’t be afraid to spa it out, bros!
5.) Procure a pair of well-fitting jeans: Sorry, but it’s #rare to find a man who knows his true jean size. And no, we don’t care what you’ve read — a bootcut pant for men is NOT ACCEPTABLE.
5.) BE A DAMN GENTLEMAN: Chivalry ain’t dead, fellas! You heard it here first.
Photo credit: Island Def Jam/Bonobos/EmmaStone.tumblr.gif/workoutgifs.tumblr.com/nyc.robbreport.com