Hmmmmm, we feel like Rihanna’s missing something in this picture…
When we first saw those Instagram photos of Rihanna paddleboarding and posing topless in Brazil, we were immediately blown away by what a little water nymph she is. Literally, give RiRi a fish tail and some dinglehoppers, and you’ve got yourself an IRL mermaid.
But then, possibly because we’re midway through “The Polar Vortex Strikes Back!” at the moment, the idea of being topless ANYWHERE — even Brazil — seems excruciatingly cold! Call us a bunch of layer queens, but girlfriend looks like she could use a sweater or something. But, what to wear?
Suddenly, it hit us. Pop stars! Boards! Layers! The only item of insulating apparel the “Can’t Remember To Forget You” singer deserves is OBVIOUSLY one of Beyoncé’s “Drunk In Love“-inspired “SURFBOARD” sweatshirts.
Look at that flawless Photoshop! Thanks, night school.
Sorry, did we say “SURFBOARD”? We meant “SURFBOARDT,” just as the good Queen Bey hath decreed from up high. So crazy that they forgot the “T” on the official crew-neck merch, though, right? Typo, much? HA HA HA HA! (Don’t mind us.)
See? Now, Rihanna’s comfortably snug enough to
paddleboard paddleboardt out on even the most frigid of waters. Godspeed, bb.