Oscar Winner Jared Leto’s 9 Winningest, Dreamiest Oscar Photos!

86th Annual Academy Awards - ShowWe forgive Jared Leto for neglecting to thank us in his Oscars acceptance speech. #ItsCool

We HATE to say “We told you so,” but, mmm-yeah, we told you Jared Leto would win the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor. (BRB, screen-printing this photo onto a t-shirt.)

To recap: We now live in a world where the 30 Seconds To Mars frontman is not only a Golden Globe winner thanks to his role in “Dallas Buyers Club,” but an Independent Spirit Award and Oscar winner, as well! That’s, like, the tri-f***ing-fecta. Could bringing about world peace and an end to the polar vortex be next? Your mouth to  Jared’s hair God’s ear. MAZEL TOV, JARED!!!

977c6614a19a11e381400e65ae9c6010_8This Indy Spirit award was basically Jared’s warm-up lap for the Oscars.

In a sign of victory to come, our future pancake-flipping husband showed off his Independent Spirit Award on Instagram Saturday night, captioning: “Thank you so much for this incredible honor!!! #indyspirits @dallasbuyers.” But, Jared’s real prize? THAT EFFORTLESS SMIZE.

7fdc0cb2a26211e3ba4f0ebe04367255_8-1Two smoking Leto brothers, four flawless eyebrows.

Naturally, the “Do Or Die” singer showed off one of his two 2014 Academy Awards ceremony dates on Instagram: his brother in DNA, music, and epic eyebrows, Shannon. And, the award for Smoking-est Leto brother in a supporting role goes to…

86th Annual Academy Awards - ArrivalsYou’re already the worst child ever for not bringing YOUR mom to the Oscars.

OH, LOOK. The whole Leto clan is here! Jared the Good Son brought our future mother-in-law his mom, Constance, too! Lord, this is one facially blessed family.

Jared Leto OscarNever have we been so jealous of a piece of metal in our life.

Cut to the ceremony. Jared’s heartwarming acceptance speech paid tribute to his mama AND to the 36-million people who’ve lost their lives to AIDS. #MenschAlert (This is the part where our neighbors called the police because we shouted “YAAAS!!!!” so loud that the dogs barked and we fell to the floor, melting into a puddle mortal matter that spelled out: #ECHELON.)

86th Annual Academy Awards - ShowAND, THEN THERE WAS PIZZA.

Host Ellen DeGeneres spoke for millions in the middle of the show when she said: “Is anyone hungry?” Cue the epic Oscars pizza party! So, not only did Jared get an Oscar, but he got a free slice, too?! #Twofer

BhxWutnCEAAtEQ6Way to hustle your face into the internet history books, Jared!

Oh, and then Jared posed with a million other A-Listers (and Lupita Nyong’o’s quick-thinking little brother) for the Greatest Group Selfie Of All Time and broke Twitter. JUST MAKIN’ HISTORY, NBD. (PS: We see you, “future ex-wifeLupita Nyong’o. Just FYI, we’ll be Jared’s future second wife. FOR ETERNITY.)

fba792c4a29b11e3842c12103ab7ffe2_8Alright, alright, alright… Hopefully, these two celebrated bigtime.

Then, Jared got to hang with his “DBC” co-star/fellow Oscar winner, Matthew McConaughey. “Me. Matthew. Thank you. #oscars #DallasBuyersClub,” he captioned, probably right before they all took shots with Jennifer Lawrence. Also: Those two in WHITE TIE? STOP, we are blinded by the light.

2014 Vanity Fair Oscar Party Hosted By Graydon Carter - Arrivals‘Member that time Jordan Catalano photobombed Mia Thermopolis.

Oh, the hijinks. Who can blame Jared for photobombing Anne Hathaway? (That wasn’t even Jared’s only Oscars photobomb.) Boyfriend needed to blow off steam. It was a crazy show, and we feel comforted by the fact that if Jared couldn’t celebrate it with us last night, his closest companion was a short, blank-faced, naked little man named Oscar.

+ Watch Jared Leto’s moving Oscars speech, watch Jared Leto’s big Oscar night recap, and see how he fared in MTV’s Oscars Fashion Awards.

Photo credit: Getty, Jared Leto’s Instagram, JaredLeto.com, @TheEllenShow