Method Man and Redman fans needed advice, so Meth and Red stopped by Fort Buzzworthy and dropped some knowledge and tips on you about the things you needed knowledge about.

Topics and tips covered include:
+ Male-female relationships. Specifically going beast mode on a dude, making your presence known "quietly, without talking," and showing some ass in a way that it's not being seen.

+ NOT using the term "ballin'," UNLESS it's SPECIFICALLY and absolutely in direct reference to Jim Jones.

+ Eating quiche.

+ Eating a d+++.

+ Eating clean.

+ Cat names.

+ Spitting in people's drinks.

+ Amazing new slang: "No fish sticks." (You got that, Kanye?)

Watch Method Man and Redman help some sad quiche-eating, cat-naming souls out in Buzzworthy's advice-column interview below. Besides Blackout! 2, this interview's the best Meth-and-Red pairing since How High. (No disrespect to Meth's work as Cheese Wagstaff, R.I.P!)

+ Bonus: Method Man and Redman discuss going vegetarian!

It is plain to see that Jim Jones is a businessman. Not only does he have that healthy glow of comfort, but his efficiency is downright enviable. Over the course of one MTV Spring Break interview, he manages to level Jay-Z, light up Keri Hilson, dog Mo'Nique and challenge Asher Roth to break a world record.

Let's start with Jay-Z: When asked what a baller should wear to beach, Jim Jones responds, "An expensive watch and a pair of Hov' slippers -- that's thong sandals -- NOT!" Remember the Cam'ron-instigated controversy a few years back over Jay-Z's footwear? Well, apparently it never died. And this diss (any diss, really) is at its harshest when it's sealed with a "NOT!" (No matter how dated that Wayne's World reference may be.) Thank you, Jim Jones, for keeping your beefs at an eighth grade level, where we all can digest them easily.

Second, Keri Hilson vs. Mo'Nique. This is where it gets really cruel ... Jones confesses to wanting to see that spunky young thing, Keri Hilson, in a bathing suit ("She got that energy!"). In the same breath he cautions Mo'Nique to keep it under wraps, whispering, "She too big!" Now that is just cold, Jim Jones.

Finally, the Dipset all-star challenges Asher Roth to go where no man has gone before and find a way to kiss five girls at the same time. He doesn't give any clues as to how this feat of engineering could be pulled off, but he does sound very confident in Asher Roth. And he should be! Those two spent the week together, clowning MTV's Spring Break, redefining what a party can be with a series of monster performances. Gettin' that Panama City Beach crowd ALL THE WAY down. Watch Jim Jones' stunningly productive interview in full, right here:

When Asher Roth isn't busy putting the "higher" in higher education -- um, his album, Asleep In The Bread Aisle, comes out APRIL 20TH, and, as you know, he REALLY loves college -- Asher's basically been minoring in spring break.

Asher Roth has already taught you not to pass out with your shoes on. Now watch him address many top-of-mind spring break concerns, from breaking stuff, to dominating the MTV Panama City Beach scene with Jim Jones, to not waking up short one kidney, to Oprah Winfrey in a bikini. 

Plus, watch him perform "I Love College" and "La Di Da." And check out Lil Wayne and Young Money on their tour bus, watch live MTV Spring Break performances, and get more of MTV's 2009 Spring Break-a-palooza. And remember: What happens at spring break stays with you... possibly forever... often in the form of itchy, incurable sores! Stay safe, kids!

I had a conversation recently with one of the bands who played MTV Spring Break 2009 -- probably better not to tell you which one -- and among the glory stories, was one of waking up on the beach between two beautiful women, both of whom were rubbing his head affectionately. If that's what the morning is like at Spring Break, can you imagine the night?!? Well, you won't have to imagine anything much longer. Tonight FNMTV returns to take you directly to the thick of this year's Spring Break at its baddest!

I can't promise that you'll get your head rubbed. That's up to you. But I can absolutely guarantee that you'll be throwin' elbows and your head back as the crowd gets down to live performances by...

Lil Wayne

Asher Roth

Jim Jones

Kid Cudi

N.E.R.D featuring Santigold

Flo Rida

All-American Rejects

3OH!3

You'd have a hard time coming up with a lineup that good on the bestseller rack at a record store. But then, I guess you'd also have a hard time finding a record store! OH SNAP! But who needs one when all the hottest action on earth is cookin' out in that Panama City Beach sunshine, just waiting for you to join in?

Keep an eye on Buzzworthy next week for more tastes of what's to come, including exclusive reports from Lil Wayne, Young Money, Asher Roth, Kid Cudi, Jim Jones, and 3OH!3. Then tune in tonight at 8pm ET to see what it's all been building up to! And just because I know you're a glutton for instant gratification, here's Jim Jones doing "Na Na Nana Na Na," live from Panama City Beach!

(Credit: Wendy Hope)

Jim Jones is all sorts of talented. The MC/mogul has appeared in multiple films, did a cameo on The Wire, has four full-length albums under his belt, a handful of mixtapes and at least as many beefs (Jay-Z, Tony Yayo and even fellow Diplomat, Cam'ron, to name a few).

The New York City hustler who co-founded Dipset with Cam'ron and Juelz Santana has gone quickly from high-ranking Blood to hip-hop hype man, to Warner Brothers A&R man, to solo MC, to video director to co-CEO of Diplomat Records and on and on and on. Dude just makes things happen. And he's in good company. Whether or not they all still get along, Cam'ron, Juelz Santana and Jim Jones are all stirring up enough buzz to give rap's biggest names a run for their money right now.

But it doesn't end there for Jim Jones. The professional hype man is going above and beyond with the promotion of his March 24 release, Pray IV Reign, and staging an off-Broadway musical called Hip-Hop Monologues: Inside The Life And Mind Of Jim Jones. The play, which already saw a limited run in November, will be performed during the week of the album's release. Jim Jones plays himself among a cast of about 20 trained actors. Has that ever been done before? Not to my knowledge.

Finally, with his acting chops already well-proven, Jim Jones dropped by MTV to film a series of exclusive Featured Artist clips. His role as a tough-talking business man isn't much of a stretch, but you definitely won't see the valley-talking Hills spoof coming.  Along with a trip to Jim Jones Industries, check out two interview clips, a Jim Jones freestyle, an exclusive "acoustic" performance of "Na Na Nana Na Na," a new photo gallery AND a "Family Tree" video playlist curated by Jim Jones himself!

Dig into that Jim Jones overload while I catch my breath a minute.

Cam'ron has come a LONG ass way from a radio-friendly Roc-A-Fella-recruit slangin' Dame Dash "Gucci'n'girls" party anthems. All due respect to Jim Jones, Juelz Santana and Freekey Zekey, through his involvement with DipSet, Cam'ron's gone from big-label punk to underground figurehead. There's a reason dude's always in purple.

With "Get It In Ohio," the second single off of his fourth-coast reppin' Crime Pays (out May 5, fingers crossed) Cam's on a giant leap forward. The first video, "I Hate My Job," stares hard times in the eye, putting Cam in the role of an unemployed, bad-luck Midwesterner.

And it's easy to make a case for "Get It In Ohio" being a continuation of that story. Frustrated Ohioan drops the classifieds and gets to thuggin'. Crime Pays. 1+2=3. But isn't it more fun to imagine that this time around, Cam's cast himself in a bigger role? Watch "Get It In Ohio" and tell me that Cam's not playing the recession itself. The economy. The E-Cam-omy. Just look at this verse.

"I'm the author for gangsters, tough guys/ did the whole Ohio, but I started off a Buckeye.
Columbus to Natti, them towns I raped 'em/ few clowns was hatin', moved my pounds to Dayton...

If you know like I know, you should lie low, Killa/ I used to get it in Ohio, don’t forget the Chi though/ guns are like a pyro, you keep playin' you will look like a gyro."

See?! Turnin' beef into cold cuts, pullin' duffel bags full of cash! Killa! No snitchin'. Watch.