Rihanna's new record, "Hard," is leaking like the pipes in a third-floor walk-up apartment. Even Rihanna herself isn't immune to the piracy that haunts the airwaves these days. And maybe that explains the eye patch she's rocking in the newly released promo video for Rated R. It's very Captain Jack Sparrow-meets-Marlene Dietrich, no?

Anywho, "Hard." It's produced by two of everyone's favorites, the radio killers Tricky Stewart and The Dream. In a recent interview on Rap-Up.com, Stewart said, "We delivered a very, very big record, but I can’t say what the name of it is or anything, just for the simple fact that it’s actually top secret."

Well, loose lips sink ships and loose singles get leaked, dog. According to Stewart, who describes "Hard" as a monster, this will be his and Dream's only contribution to the album (much like "Umbrella" was their sole contribution to Good Girl Gone Bad).

Rihanna's "Hard" is well...hard. It's got a slight reggae vibe, with some incredible percussion and a really top-drawer verse from Young Jeezy.

+ Listen to "Hard" right here. Will it be bigger than "Umbrella"? Can anything be bigger than "Umbrella"? Let us know what you think in the comments!

Bold, bright makeup looks -- like Lady Gaga's baby pink lipstick, the spring green eyeshadow Adam Lambert rocks on the cover of his For Your Entertainment album cover or the statement-making dramatic deep-dark makeup choices Rihanna makes -- are a fun way to play with color, especially as winter rolls in. But neon looks aren't always easy to achieve. So I called on Doe Deere (that's her above), who's a model, musician, and owner of makeup line Lime Crime.

Doe Deere's constructed an entire modern-day Rainbow Brite universe of unicorns, cupcakes, candy, and cats (not to mention science!) So she's just the perfect person to show you how to properly apply crazy-bright, highly pigmented fluorescent lipsticks and shadows to get the perfect Gaga/ Lambert/ Rihanna/ pick your popstar look.

STOP what you're doing because whatever you're doing is NOWHERE NEAR as important as the precious time you're about to spend or already have spent staring slack-jawed at the glorious artistic masterpiece that is Adam Lambert's just-released For Your Entertainment album cover.

Reactions to Adam Lambert's For Your Entertaiment cover art have ranged from Very Bowie to fan art gone wild to the resurrection of Jem And The Holograms to "gayer than anything man can conceive of."

To be sure, Adam Lambert is fully in on the joke -- he just Tweeted: "Thank you to those who appreciate and understand that the album cover is deliberately campy. It's an omage to the past. It IS ridiculous." (Except homage is spelled with an "h." Oh well. He's got singing going for him.)

Anyway, I LOVE ridiculous. I LIVE by ridiculous. And I love that the art direction for For Your Entertainment was basically like "Um, so, let's take Prince's Purple Rain album art, Rihanna's Rated R cover art, and Steel Panther's Death To All But Metal cover art, add Kate Gosselin's wig but spray paint it blue, mkay? But let's ALSO paint Adam's nails black too, because that's always symbolically dark." I also love that it looks like the kind of mural you'd see airbrushed onto the wall of a crumbling skating rink. The only thing that truly makes no sense is the budget-looking font used for Adam Lambert's name. I think my accountant uses the same font. Boring! MOAR SPARKLES PLZE!

Therefore, embracing all that is fantastically fun about camp, and admitting that it's great to worship at the altar of glam and Glambert, here's how YOU can get Adam Lambert's For Your Entertainment album art look! JUST in time for Halloween!

+ NEON YELLOW/ GREEN EYESHADOW: Try Bloody Mary's Neon Yellow eyeshadow. Apply liberally to corner of eyes after making cat-eyes with hardcore amounts of black eyeliner. The more the better. Then make a sullen but beautiful pouty face. (Watch Tidal-era Fiona Apple videos for inspo.)

+ SHEER PINK LIPSTICK: I believe "baby pink" is the look Adam's going for. NARS' Roman Holiday completes the pretty picture, no? And so appropriately titled!

+ KATE GOSSELIN WIG: I mean, that's exactly what's going on here. Get a Kate Gosselin wig, some blue spray paint, and then spray the f+++ out of it.

+ SPARKLY STAR GLITTER: Because you've already come this far. Makeup For Ever's star glitter was pretty much invented for Glambert.

+ RAZOR: All excess body hair was shed for this shoot. Do it like you mean it. Because it's time for miracles, y'all.

Rihanna's back! Like she never left! And when you take a step back and think about it, you'll notice she never really did leave, did she?

Good Girl Gone Bad came out in the sepia-toned, black & white era of 2007. 2007! But, despite having last released an album almost three years ago, Ri-Ri has pretty much stayed up in our business, right? Running the proverbial town, running around assorted fashion weeks. Well, now she's officially back. Rated R is due November 23rd, and the first single, "Russian Roulette" dropped today.

Written by Ne-Yo (who had a hand in "Unfaithful" and "Take A Bow"), "Russian Roulette" is a slow building, creeping track that some have said betrays the influence of the British electronic sub-genre of Dubstep. To my ears it sounds more like mid-period Massive Attack (especially the bassline). What say you?

+ Listen to "Russian Roulette" at Rihanna's official site.

Word around the campfire is that Rihanna's ready to make the follow-up to Good Girl Gone Bad, an album whose various incarnations has spawned more hits than a mafia war.

According to MTV News,  Rihanna's gonna enter the studio with some familiar faces -- "Umbrella" writer/producer Tricky Stewart, Justin Timberlake -- and some new ones as well, like The All-American Rejects' Tyson Ritter. With those past and future Rihanna collabos in mind, I started daydreaming about who else could make this good girl even better. (And whether or not she'll wear a see-through dress to the studio.)

1. Hot Chip
While it may often be broken, Rihanna has a New Wave heart. You can heart it in her Soft-Cell-sampling early hit, "S.O.S." or in the bum-bum-be-dum's of "Disturbia." She's ready for some synths, electro leanings, and all the attendant eyeliner and Flock Of Seagulls hair that goes with it. (Wait! Rihanna HAS Flock of Seagulls hair!) So why not work with some of the finest purveyors of neo-New-Wave? Hot Chip could expertly combine R&B, dance and pop for Rihanna.

2. Katy Perry
Katy Perry and Rihanna are basically already besties, so why not get in the studio together. If Rihanna lacks anything (and she doesn't lack much) it's a defined personality. Her whole thing is the blank stare, the elusive, untouchable girl. Maybe Katy could giver her something there. Like a sense of humor, or a more human, normal vibe. Not that there ain't a lot to love in Rihanna's current robot-diva-from-the-future thing. Or maybe they could both cake dive together.

3. Ryan Tedder
The OneRepublic singer/songwriter might be accused of ripping himself off (Beyonce's "Halo" begats Kelly Clarkson's "Already Gone"), but it's a heck of a blueprint to work from. This seems like a no-brainer, right? I can already hear Rihanna singing "Apologize" in my head. Her airy, pleading voice would work great with his melodies.

It's always sort of sweet when people in couples start mirroring one another's affectations and habits. And while Katy Perry and Russell Brand have only just become semi-official, Katy Perry is already starting to sound like Russell Brand.

Katy Perry got the chance to interview German fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld (or, Uncle Karl, as we lovingly refer to him) during her time haunting around Paris' Fashion Week (spending most of her time as Thelma to Rihanna's Louise).

The video, courtesy of Elle Magazine, features a nervous-looking Perry bravely playing inquisitor to the iconic designer. Things are going well enough until -- COR! BLIMEY! -- Perry starts talking like a charming Dickensian chimney sweep! (Or, kinda like Madonna!) The resemblance to her new beau's accent is, uh, striking to say the least. At least she didn't rock the Muppet dress, that really would've clashed with her new drawl.

+ Watch Katy Perry interview Karl Lagerfeld (and channel Madonna!).

Despite a blossoming love affair with Russell Brand, Katy Perry has been seen being all Elvira/I-Have-A-Cure-Disintegration-poster-hanging-on-the-wall-of-my-soul at the Sonia Rykiel show in Paris on October 4.

Real talk: It's working. Katy Perry might have blown up with a look that resembled a piece of watermelon Bubble-Yum come to life, all greens and pinks, and fruit-as-sex metaphors and whatnot. But she's been rolling through Paris, usually accompanied by Rihanna, like some kind of vampire/Blade Runner robot (or the lost female member of Tokio Hotel?) and it's A. GOOD. LOOK. Wonder if this means Katy's follow up to One Of The Boys is gonna be all doom and gloom and synths? Yes, please?

Dark and gloomy Katy Perry is a total departure from diving-into-cake Katy Perry of a year ago at the 2008 Los Premios. Not that we mind that Katy Perry either. Watch the video here.

What'd you do this weekend? Oh, watched movies on the couch in your pajama bottoms? (As in, what I did this weekend?) That's great. Well Rihanna pretty much poned Paris Fashion Week in a tuxedo jacket, super on-trend thigh-high boots and no pants at the Vivienne Westwood on Friday, bondage gear at the Jean-Paul Gaultier show on Saturday, and on Sunday Rihanna and Katy Perry, who just got back from Thailand with Russell Brand, hit the Karl Lagerfeld show together, where Rihanna finally pulled a very un-Lady Gaga move and put some pants on. Still, two words: DAMN. GINA. Rihanna's safety goggles and leather dress, however, not so much.

Qu'est-ce que c'est? Rihanna showed up to the Gareth Pugh fashion show in Paris yesterday in a VERY little black Fendi dress that was bigger on the "little" than it was on the "dress."

Even though Rihanna's dress was a probably coûter la peau des fesses, it left VERY LITTLE to the imagination and gave errrybody a WHOLE LOT of au naturel to go around. Still, it was nothing more shocking than her bondage-inspired Vogue Italia shoot. And at least she preempted the need for a black censor bar. Thanks, Rihanna!

Watch Rihanna at the Gareth Pugh show, and check out the runway and the designer in this Telegraph.co.uk clip. And tell me what you think of Rihanna's scandalous barely-there LBD.

Now that you've had time to watch... and re-watch Miley Cyrus' latest video, "Party In The U.S.A," here are five things -- from Britney Spears in school to Rihanna to Lenny Kravitz -- you might not know about the addictive track.

1.) The video was directed by Chris Applebaum, which you probably know, but Chris Applebaum also directed Rihanna's legendary "Umbrella" video, Paris Hilton's spooftastic Carl's Junior commercial -- which got banned after being called too porny -- as well as Britney Spears' "Overprotected" and "I Love Rock 'N' Roll" videos. Unsurprisingly, Miley shouts out Britney in the lyrics of "Party In The U.S.A," celebrates her Southern heritage, and took to Twitter to thank her fans for the Britney comparisons when they came pouring in after her pole-tastic performance at the 2009 Teen Choice Awards.

2.) Miley's "Party In The U.S.A" video isn't the first video to use a dusty road the American flag as a backdrop. Lenny Kravitz did it exactly 10 years ago in the 1999 video for his Grammy-winning single, "American Woman."

3.) Miley's "Party In The U.S.A." video was inspired by the movie Grease. Grease, which is one of Miley's favorite movies, starred John Travolta, with whom Miley worked with in the movie Bolt 20 years after Grease's release. The Grease song "Hopelessly Devoted to You" was nominated for a 1979 Academy Award for Best Music - Original Song. Bolt was nominated for a 2008 Academy Award for Best Animated Feature but lost to WALL•E.

4.) The party in "Party In The U.S.A." takes place in Hollywood, and while the Grease-inspired "Party In The U.S.A." video is set in the South of Miley's upbringing, one of the high schools where the movie Grease was filmed was Venice High School in Los Angeles. Not only were the movies Pretty In Pink and Heathers filmed there, but Britney Spears' "Baby One More Time" video was filmed there too.

5.) Miley's "Party In The U.S.A." video is also centered around a drive-in movie, if you can believe such a concept ACTUALLY existed. (No, they didn't just exist in the movie Grease.) Apparently when they were first dating, Miley's parents, Billy Ray and Tish, frequented a drive-in theater in Kentucky. To date, there are approximately 11 drive-in theaters in Kentucky and about 15 in Miley's home state of Tennessee.