Today’s news that Jeff Archuleta — father of Buzzworthy idol David Archuleta — was arrested for soliciting a sex act at a not-really-focused-on-relieving-your-back-pain massage parlor was nothing short of completely shocking and extremely sad. We’re extremely protective of our little Arch Angel and wish him lots of love and… whatever else you wish a person when they (and the whole world) find out that their Mormon dad got busted for a happy ending. By the cops.

With that, here are five more celebrity dads who will absolutely give me another heart attack if I find out they went to an “unlicensed spa.”

KEVIN JONAS, SR.
Paul Kevin Jonas, Sr., father of Kevin, Joe, Nick, and Frankie is a former pastor and manages his sons’ career (they’re in a band called “the Jonas Brothers”) which is a full-time job. Also, I’ve met the man, and he’s a saint. I JUST KNOW in my happy little heart that Kevin Jonas, Sr. is just not capable of such indiscretions. It’s just impossible.

BILLY RAY CYRUS
Miley’s “Thrill Billy” daddy does have the whole out-of-wedlock thing on his side (come on! it was the free-wheelin’ ’90s!), and then there was the Vanity Fair/ almost-naked pix thing, but he’s still a true family man who’s biggest crime, in my opinion, is the highlights.

PETE WENTZ
Pete Wentz already aired all of his dirty laundry (and more!) before he settled down with Ashlee Simpson, who cranked out super-cuters Bronx. And even though he’s hung with the occasional stripper, he’s got a totally hot piece at home. Plus, they’re one of those couples who sorta looks like they do it all the time. VIVA LA SIMPSON-WENTZES!

CLAY AIKEN
Clay Aiken is far too busy… wait, what’s Clay Aiken doing these days? Oh, going to the airport! Anyway, yay! He has a cute baby! Yay!

CHARLIE SWAN
BELLA’S DAD commit a crime? PUH-LEASE! What crime could the CHIEF OF POLICE OF FORKS possibly commit? I mean, sure, he’s sometimes a little emotionally unavailable, and he can’t cook to save his life, and true, he’s still a bit hung up on his ex-wife, but you CANNOT say that  Charlie Swan doesn’t love his daughter. Probably the only crime Charlie Swan is guilty of is BEING BORN A HUMAN.

+ Now, speaking of fathers and crimes, watch George Michael’s “Father Figure” video.

With the LOOOOONG wait for Ashley Tisdale’s “It’s Alright, It’s Ok” video finally over, and the wait for her next album, Guilty Pleasure ALMOST over, let’s look at five fast facts about Ashley’s new break-up video, “It’s Alright, It’s OK,” okay? Okay! You may be shocked (shocked!) to discover how many Zac Efron connections are contained in just this one video — and not just because Ashley’s in it. Oh, and there’s even a Twilight tie-in too!

1.) In the very beginning of the video, Ashley kicks over a garden gnome. Not only are those things scary, but the first garden gnome was made in the Gräfenroda region of Germany in the mid 1800s. A group of gnomes is referred to as a “donsy.” (Jeopardy! question alert!)

2.) In the video, Ashley’s cheating ex-boyfriend is played by actor Adam Gregory, who’s got another Zac Efron connection besides the fact that he’s in “It’s Alright, It’s OK” with Ashley Tisdale — he was also in 17 Again. WITH ZAC EFRON. Adam Gregory’s also on the new 90210. Who was also on 90210? Kellan Lutz — hello, Twilight tie-in! Adam Gregory was also in Hannah Montana: The Movie (Miley alert!), and was once in a Chili’s commercial, apparently.

3.) Can you handle ANOTHER Zac Efron “It’s Alright, It’s Okay” connection? Good. The video was filmed in L.A., which is WHERE ZAC EFRON LIVES!

4.) One of the guys Ashley takes those revenge photos with is Brazilian underwear model Edilson Nascimento. He’s modeled for Guess, but did I also mention he’s an underwear model? Because he is. He DEFINITELY is.

5.) “It’s Alright, It’s OK” was directed by Scott Speer, who also directed V Factory’s “Love Struck” video (ahem), as well as Aly & AJ’s “Like Woah.” Aly and AJ… WENT TO ZAC EFRON’S BIRTHDAY PARTY in 2008! But, back to Ashley Tisdale — she and Scott Speer are totally dating! Cute!

+ Watch “It’s Alright It’s OK”

Plus:
+ Ashley Tisdale at the 2009 MTV Movie Awards!
+ Ashley Tisdale answers Buzzworthy fan questions!
+ Exclusive MTV photos of Ashley Tisdale!

So, Taylor Lautner was running around, all werewolf-y (uhh… spoiler?) in L.A. the other day — probs getting ready to walk the red carpet at the 2009 MTV Movie Awards — and he was spotted wearing a pair of slip-on low-cut wingtip boots by Auri Footwear. The name of the boots? And I’m seriously not even making this up here: “The Ladies Man.” Yes. Really. Coincidence? DOUBT IT. If I were as hot as Taylor Lautner, I’d ONLY purchase stuff with hot-sounding names to match my jacked-up crazy hotness. When you’re Taylor Lautner, you can do that. I mean, these boots might as well be named after him.

+ Watch Taylor, Kristen Stewart, and Robert Pattinson present the New Moon trailer (CGI JACOB!!!) at the 2009 MTV Movie Awards! Plus: check out Kristen Stewart/ Bella’s Keds, and Robert Pattinson’s underwear!

Wanna live Kristen Stewart’s glamorous Robert Pattinson-kissing, Movie Award-dropping life? Sorry. Can’t help you there. But I can help you follow in Kristen Stewart’s famous footsteps. Er… Bella’s…

Style spotters: Kristen Stewart wore a pair of classic Keds “Champion” lace-ups in navy blue while shooting the reunion scene in New Moon in Montepulciano, Italy. (PIVOTAL PLOT POINT!) And it looks like she also wore a beige pair during a LaPush scene.

So, while chances are VERY high that you’ll never suck face with Robert Pattinson, you can walk in Bella’s shoes. Buy them at Keds.com for just $35. They’re perfect for summer, and they’re definitely cuter than the staid, plain white Keds Kelly Kapowski always wore on Saved By The Bell, you know?

+ Watch Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson almost-kiss (again) at the 2009 MTV Movie Awards, and, after the jump, watch the New Moon trailer for the fif.teen.billion.th time.

Plus, check out the Toms Shoes Kristen Stewart loves in real life (and so do I!) and Bella’s BB Dakota Twilight jacket!

Read more…

(Credit: John Shearer - Wire Image)

Last night was a really big deal for Kings Of Leon, but it’s hard to imagine them stressing it too hard. They always play it so cool. But nervous or not, Tennessee’s Followill brothers (and cousin) had one of the biggest rapt audiences of their young lives last night, and they flat-out killed it on whoa-oh anthem, “Use Somebody.”

The Only By The Night single won the boys plenty of new admirers last night, but they already had some high-profile fans in the audience. Zac Efron (who won Best Male Performance for High School Musical 3: Senior Year) and Robert Pattinson (who won pretty much everything else) to name two! The show’s studliest guests (although those Followills give ‘em a run for their money!) both have their iPods loaded up with Kings Of Leon.

And as we’ve told you before, Miley Cyrus (who fist-bumped God for making “The Climb” Best Song) and Taylor Swift (who popped up in the Twilight segment of Andy Samberg’s intro) have big crushes on KOL bassist Jared Followill. So, it’s no surprise that the 2009 MTV Movie Awards gave Kings Of Leon a very warm welcome, and kept clapping well into the commercial break!

Watch their full performance of “Use Somebody,” below, and see what Hollywood’s all worked up about.

+ Kings Of Leon Rehearsal Photos
+ 2009 MTV Movie Awards Performance Photos
+ Bonus Kings Of Leon Photo Album!

DUDES! Don’t forget! The 2009 MTV Movie Awards are Sunday, May 31 — that’s TONIGHT — at 9PM, LIVE from Los Angeles with host Andy Samberg! Bawse!

Plus:

+ Musical performances by Eminem! And Kings of Leon! (Not bad, right?)

+ A sneak peek at the New Moon trailer! (Ahh! Edward! So sparkly and brooding and perfect!)

+ Stuff you’d NEVER see at the Oscars (snoooooze fest!), like Best WTF Moment, featuring poop, pee, and nudity!

+ Best Kiss, which could go to two dudes, a vampire, Angelina Jolie OR Zac Efron. Or maybe Angelina will kiss Zac Efron. Maybe Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson will both make out. Who knows!??

+ A battle royale for Best Song From A Movie! Miley versus Bruce Springsteen (like a BAWSE!) versus JAI HO versus Paramore!

+ Megawatt celebrities like Robert Pattinson. Kristen Stewart. Zac Efron. Vanessa Hudgens. Will Ferrell. Leighton Meester. Megan Fox. BE IMPRESSED. Be watching.

+ Things that are more exciting to watch than to read in list form, so make sure you tune in tonight at 9PM! DO IT! (Jimmy Fallon is!) And get up-to-the-minute Movie Awards insider access on the MTV Movies Blog.

If you don’t want any spoilers, then skip ahead and just watch Cinema Bizarre answer your Buzzworthy fan questions. But if you need a little warm-up, here are my five favorite moments from the interview:

1.) Kiro’s love for Twilight and Ashley Greene! Also, Kiro has WAMPIRE teeth!

2.) Strify’s favorite English word. (It’s SO glam. I won’t spoil it for you though.)

3.) The guys’ definition of “skinny hair” and how it relates to jail. And Beetlejuice.

4.) Beatboxing parrots! (Thank you, Shin!)

5.) KISSING and a DATE with FATE!

A few more amazing components of Cinema Bizarre’s fan question interview includes t.A.T.u. (and any interview that involves t.A.T.u. is a total win in my book), tattoos, Taylor Swift, and tongue piercing.

+ Watch Cinema Bizarre answer Buzzworthy fan questions after the jump. Watch it more than once. Then watch it again. It’s blitz. It’s bliss.

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If “Sink Into Me” — the lead single off Taking Back Sunday’s upcoming album, New Again, due out June 2 — is any indication of things to come on the rest of the album, then this is about to become The Summer Of Sunday.

Check out the tar-covered, Jimmy Eat world-tinged “Sink Into Me” video (no, it wasn’t inspired by Twilight… GOD! NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT TWILIGHT… Wait… Yeah… Everything basically is about Twilight… but not Taking Back Sunday’s new video), directed by Travis Kopach, who also directed Meg & Dia’s “Monster,” and All Time Low’s “Dear Maria Count Me In” video.

Oh yeah, see why Matt Rubano thought prom was a sucky crapfest.

Did you know that the winners of the 2009 MTV Movie Awards are pretty much up to you? The nominees have been announced, and you can vote right now to determine who’s gonna take home the Golden Popcorn at this year’s show, airing May 31 at 9PM. Kinda makes you feel sorry for all the movies that aren’t Twilight, doesn’t it?

Particularly of interest around here is the Best Song From A Movie category. A super diverse cross-section, it pits old guard heavyweight Bruce Springsteen (The Wrestler) against Eastern import A.R. Rahman (Slumdog Millionaire) and flashy Buzzworthy besties Miley Cyrus (Hannah Montana: The Movie) and Paramore (Twilight, obvs).

So, the question is, can anything beat Twilight? The odds are long, but I’ve seen Miley’s fan club take over Times Square, and they are nothing to trifle with. Also, Slumdog took the Oscars and Bruce has been the Boss of all music for 30+ years.

In other words, as is always the case at an MTV awards show, anything can happen. The outcome is completely in your hands. All you have to do is vote 25,000 times. No biggie. Watch the videos, and vote now!

Have you heard of Mute Math yet? They’ve been around about six years, pumping a steady gush of heady adrenaline into New Orleans’ bloodstream with frantic layered rock songs. They were also on the soundtrack to a little vampire movie called Twilight. Maybe you’ve heard of it?

Made up of Paul Meany (Rhodes, bass, keytar, keys, samples, vocals, guitar), Darren King (drums, samples), Greg Hill (guitar, vocals) and Roy Mitchell-Cárdenas (bass, upright bass, bass drum) — that’s four musicians playing a minimum of twelve instruments — it doesn’t take much math to understand how they come up with their uniquely ADHD-addled sound.

Equally glitchy and overstimulating is Mute Math’s video for their new single, “Spotlight.” Shot in double time in the back of a moving vehicle, and propelled by a manic clap-track, the in-your-face clip is the musical equivalent of a keg of espresso. Another thing to keep in mind: a previous Mute Math video, “Typical,” got the band nominated for a Grammy! Better not miss this one… Watch “Spotlight” after the jump!

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